Gene and Aaron take Carl Smith’s four-step process for hard decisions and run it through a basic training emergency, a stalled event, and the calls they both still carry. Get after it.
Aaron came back for another one, and after a detour through zombie apocalypse prep and the two axes on the wall behind Gene, the conversation landed on a newsletter. Carl Smith, a good friend of both of them from the Bureau of Digital, wrote up the process he used the day he had to cancel one of his own events. Four steps. Say the decision out loud in a plain sentence. Talk to the people closest to it before you decide. Put a date on the calendar. Then say what is changing, plainly. Gene and Aaron take each step and hold it up against their own history.
They open on why the tough calls pile up in the first place. The easy thing is easy right now and expensive later, and most of us are optimists who figure it will work out. Sometimes it does, which teaches you the wrong lesson. Aaron tells the Chinese farmer parable, the one where every stroke of luck and every disaster gets the same answer, we will see, and the two of them draw the line that matters: choosing to do nothing is a decision. Just not deciding is not. Gene brings in Musashi, the way is in training, and the idea that decision-making is a drilled skill and not a character trait. That is where Aaron’s basic training story comes in. Twenty-three years old, on staff duty at Fort Bragg, drill sergeant nowhere to be found, a kid going into seizures. He made the call to go help and then made a second call to get an ambulance there. The right thing by any human measure and the wrong thing by military procedure, and he stood outside at parade rest for three hours waiting to find out which one counted. The drill sergeant came back and told him the kid really did have a problem, and he was okay thanks to Aaron, and he was still going to stand there another hour because it was never about that.
From there they work Carl’s steps in order. The plain sentence, and why the verb in it is the whole point. Aaron’s journaling habit and the value of writing out the instead of, the other outcomes, before you can get to the sentence. Then the hardest step for any owner operator: asking people what they think before you have decided, instead of shopping a decision around for validation. Aaron has run that experiment on purpose, and the feedback is always better when he asks what would you do instead of what do you think of what I am doing. He also shares an event that has been in limbo for months at his organization. He said no when the estimate came in a hundred thousand dollars over, the space turned out to be reserved already, the cost dropped, and now there is a week left to decide and still not all the information. Which leads to the line Gene needed to hear: sometimes you cannot get all the information. You just have to go through the thing.
They spend real time on ego and leadership. Gene admits he promoted Thomas and Brian to coaches at the gym without asking a single person first and calls it leading with his ego without meaning to. Neither of them has ever worked with a truly democratic leader and both admit it would drive them nuts. Aaron’s formula: three quarters ego to make the hard calls, one quarter held in reserve to figure out what is actually right. Then the two dates, deciding and telling, and why they should never be the same day. The military rule that an 80 percent plan executed now beats a perfect plan later. And the step both of them are guilty of, over-explaining the decision because sharing the process feels safe. Aaron’s leadership team argued over whether to present the decision then the justification or walk people through the story that leads to it, and he is honest that presenting the decision is often harder than making it.
The episode closes on the aftermath. The warrior does not pretend the cost is zero. He carries it honestly and keeps walking. Gene talks about quitting events two years before COVID and losing an entire world of people in the process. Aaron has made plenty of bad decisions and does not regret the big ones, because sometimes the decision gets made for you and sometimes you were the one who made it, and you have to be okay carrying either.
Mentioned in this episode:
Carl Smith and the Bureau of Digital newsletter,
“Making The Tough Call” Miyamoto Musashi, the way is in training Marcus Aurelius,
“If anyone can refute me, show me I am making a mistake, I will gladly change
“The Chinese farmer parable (we will see)
SEAL Team (the series)
Jurassic Park: The Lost World, and the observer effect
Never give up. Never quit. Kaizen. Get after it.
